
Top Melee player Joseph “Mang0” Marquez was seen last night in Norwalk, CA destroying everything in his path after dropping from 9600 to 9400 subscribers on Twitch.tv/mang0. The man claimed he had planned to do this for quite some time, but hadn’t reached his tipping point until he had to buy his son the video game “Super Smash Bros. Ultimate” for Christmas. Sources say the twitch streamer’s son asked for the game and the Melee player exploded with rage, claiming that he was “no son of his.” It is unclear if Mang0’s son is okay, but authorities have reported the child having extreme tendonitis from hours upon hours of non consensual tech-skill practice in the 17 year old game “Melee”.
Far down the block at his local residence in Norwalk, CA, trash cans, lampposts, and Nintendo Switches can be seen strewn about, surrounded by police tape until the carnage has been fully evaluated. It is unknown if the melee elitist has made any statements on his motivations.
The Melee community, notorious for fostering toxic individuals such as Jeffrey “Axe” Williamson and Adam “Armada” Lindgren, has declined to comment on the incident. The Smash community has made a statement that Mang0 will be banned from all Smash events for 3 weeks and forced to wear a “Melee elitist” sign at any events he may be forced to attend by his sponsors.
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This is a joke right
In case of the random passerby, The Turnip is a satirical site (ala The Onion).
It honestly amazes me how so many cannot tell if this is fake or real.
no, this is real. how did you not know?
mango is dangerous
…seriously?
yes
What ? Is this fake news?
It’s a satirical website. Everything on it isn’t real.
Lol nice satire
Please tell me this is fake
Fake news
I think it’s fake because mango has bin playing ultimate himself on stream so this article makes no sense??!!
This isn’t real, it’s believeable until the point they call Armada and axe toxic
xd
Wut?!?!?
Lol
Sounds very fake.
Lmaoooo ofc it’s a joke this article retarded
Hee hee
There is a precedent for this. Mango is known for his bizarre twitter threats, like the time he tweeted “WHEN you thought you were out of clean undies and find a pair of clean ones KREY”.
Most dangerous Melee man ™!
Wow judging by these comments people are fucking idiots. Sad.
Wow judging by these comments people are fucking idiots. So sad.